In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
