Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize