I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
