Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
