He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize