Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
