Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
