Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
