did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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