MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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