Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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