Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
