someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize