i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so let's talk penis.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
