can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
