I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
