I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
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