i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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