That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
