Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
