I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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