You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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