I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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