I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize