At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I think people are normalizing furries
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