oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
babies were throwing up all over the place
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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