Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize