I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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