Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
