listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
