Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Never joke about your clitoris.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
