I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I came so hard my ears popped.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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