whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
