How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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