One girl and one boy is just not enough.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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