im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
