mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
