so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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