so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
The maid of honor just puked.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
