His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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