I hope mine doesn't look like that
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
