nut hugger
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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