Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
