your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
