let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
My liver is preforming stress tests.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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