turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's never too late to be topless.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
