the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize