Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i will never coherently bang her
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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