Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
