he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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